有时候真的觉得自己很没出息，什么都做不好总会怕这个怕那个。。
时常觉得自己不能胜任的，希望把一切越推越远。。不管我事更好！
就如那天，尝试做些没做过的事。。话很少，不太敢说，因为我真的不知要说什么！完全不曾接触的东西要我去传达，万一说错怎办！讲真的是有点不爽，但又能怎样？没人了，剩我。。
有时我不停在问自己，真的还想参嘛？为的是什么？只因为不想他们失去多一个吗？我存在的意义是什么？想等待些什么？要想得到什么？怕失去什么？
言归正传，传达完我的部分后，一切真的很模糊。。不知自己讲什么，好像傻婆！可悲。。再来是有件事，原本朋友打算让我带出另一个环节。。但我们却对那游戏不清楚。。便叫另一位帮忙咯。。但是，却变成另一种局面，他成了主持！我和我的拍档。。只好站一边咯。。好像陪衬的。。
我和另一个都觉得无所谓。。习惯就好。。我本来话就不多。。费事冷场啦！
哪知道，我的朋友迟进来，却问我跟他主持酱惨，只能靠边。。
哈哈，我没回他说，其实我和另一个才是今天主持。。他不是。。非常好笑。。
但也没多说什么。。每个人都知道那个人的个性。。
我不善于主持，我很清楚。。我想尝试，但也要遇到对的话题。。对一个我基本上不太认识的东西，要我表达。。真的很困难！我真的彻底失败，对吧！
我在于他们之间，他们会觉得我不多话，从不表达。。少主见。。我，算是酱的人吧！很少有主见，一切逆来顺受。。只因为对这社团模糊，觉得自己并没什么贡献！
好在。。我算蛮乐观的。不会为这些事烦躁。。从不会转牛角尖，弄得自己不开心！
一切听天由命吧，明年就摆脱了。。到时想参也没份了。。
哈哈。。总忍不足想了又想。。存在。。是为什么！！
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2 comments:
For me, u r a person that only will talk more with friends. I also like that too, but u better than me b'coz u more earier to get with friends
I am also a person that don't know how to communicate with the person i dunno, dunno y mayb b'coz of i scare the word that i said will hurt them or mayb they won't like me....dunno y some people just like us, everyday scare this and that
Anyway, u r more easier to communicate with people, for me, knowing a new friend also take a long time, but now better maybe working force me talking more...
Environment and time will make 1 person more stronger, i believe u can do it, if u felt u r lost in the middle of the road, dun worry, just rest for while before u continue ur journey. Rest can make ur mind calm down, and think more, find the right road for urself.
Sometime i also will lost, why eveyday i sitting in front of the computer and doing this thing? R this is the right way for me? Y other people can go so fast but i can't, is that means i'm not suitable for this place?
Everyday will come out so many questions, noone can help me to answer it, b'coz that is my life, i have to answer myself. That what i told myself, "everything will go smoothly if i won't give up, this is what i choose for, believe myself and continue it. If it failed, nevermind at least u had try ur best."
;p....sorry, say so much like a "lao po po"....hahaha~~people say: "say easy, do hard" but just a word for u....
haha..thanks arr..but m quite an optimistic person..no worry..i very "see open" geh..u ahh...although is slower..but dun ever think u r not suit in this field..just treat it as an experience..not from a baby straight away can walk without learning to crawl...stick with own determination...yea yea..gambate with us..
haha..m a very "sampat" fren in front of u all...but 4 them..i always keep myself quiet..remain silence...hoho
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